Most people confuse their wishes and fantasies to be burning desires.

In simple terms, a wish is something that you want and you have no interest in paying the price to get it. Similarly, a burning desire is something that you want but you are willing to go the length to get it. In both cases, people will passionately talk about it.

The confusion happens when the “wishing” person is highly articulate and persuasive. It makes you feel that the person has a burning desire to make something happen.

What would be a test – a sort of litmus test to separate the two?

A simple test would be to notice and observe what was at stake as they went after their wish or burning desire. If nothing substantial was at stake, there is a good chance that it was a “wish.”

Why is this important to know?

The “pure wish” people are not serious but they appear to be. If they are charming too, then they might make requests off of you to engage with them to discuss their “wish” projects. You will now put something precious ( your time ) at stake to help someone who is really only looking to spend time talking about it. If you fall for it, you incurred an opportunity cost and the “wishing” person simply had a good time at your expense.

Make your help count. Investing your energy for people with “burning desire” will make something happen. If you spend your energy on the “wishing” crowd, you won’t have the time to spend your energy on people with “burning desires.”

Photo Courtesy: netman007 on Flickr