The one unquestionable filter for people in your network

Right out of the bat, let me share this quote from Oprah Winfrey even at the risk of giving away the essence of this article

Here it goes:

Lots of people want to ride with you in the limo, but what you want is someone who will take the bus with you when the limo breaks down.


I have had successes and failures just like all of you.

When the first time I had a failure, I lost a few friends.

That was painful.

Actually, strike that.

That was very painful.

Those I thought were near and dear to me silently walked away without giving a clue.

Once I calmed down, I realized that they were NEVER near and dear to me in the first place. They were near and dear to the possibilities I was bringing to them.

I was, in short, means to an end.

When the “means” was questionable, there was no need for them to devote any time with me.

I was an opportunity cost for them.

Slowly and steadily, I learned.

Slow part was painful, for sure.

A few years ago, I made a mental switch.

Whenever I witnessed a setback, I realized that my focus has to be on what I need to get back on my feet rather than focusing on part of the network that was going to disappear.

Next, I started looking at the half-full part of the network glass.

In fact, I thought it is to my advantage to know that my network will get totally optimized as part of the network will self-select to continue to be there for me.

A setback created an unquestionable filter for my network.

The real network continued to exist

The not-so-real network disappeared fast.

So, while setbacks were not desired, it would be impossible to avoid them because as an entrepreneur I take chances and with that comes the risks for failure along the way.

So, my suggestion to you:

When a face a setback and part of your network disappears, thank God for the filter that the setback created. More importantly be happy for the network that remained with you post setback.

Photo Courtesy: j-No on Flickr